7 Minutes Or Less

English Camp

2010-01-09T08:06:00.000-08:00

For two days before and two days after Christmas my school ran an English Camp. The point of the camp is to teach English (obviously) to the students in a more entertaining way than ordinary class. The students at my school were lucky enough to play basketball, sing songs, learn a dance, and read books, to name just a few of the activities that filled the four day camp. The last day of camp was performance day, and I managed to make a few videos of some of the students "performing."

The 1st and 2nd graders had to introduce themselves in English. They were very nervous to do this in front of all the teachers and other students, but I think they did well.

Here's a 1st grade girl introducing herself:

Here's a 2nd grader introducing himself:

And here is a group of 4th, 5th, and 6th graders singing Old MacDonald:

Proving just how great of a teacher I am, none of those students spoke a word of English before camp started.

(That might not be true.)

(But I'm still a great teacher.)

Vacation!

2010-01-09T07:05:00.000-08:00

One of the few perks of the whole teaching in Korea job (other than not having to pay rent, free air fare to and from Korea, and the whole getting to live in Korea thing) is the 3 weeks paid vacation we get over winter break. My vacation started yesterday, Friday, and this Tuesday I'll be flying to the Philippines. Rough life, huh? I'm traveling with one other teacher from Taebaek, and we'll be there for 2 weeks.

What are you going to do for 2 weeks in the Philippines? Well, other than sit on a beach and get tan, we have no real plans. Well, no plans besides swimming with whale sharks. That's right. We'll be swimming with whale sharks. Try not to get too jealous.

He Lives!

2010-01-09T06:15:00.000-08:00

Oh look Brian hasn't posted in a long time. Go figure. Don't worry, I'm working on that right now. To start, here is a link to the photobucket account I just set up, so everyone can see all the pictures I have been taking and will be taking while in Korea. Enjoy.

http://s760.photobucket.com/albums/xx241/bnewsom3/

Your Turn to Suffer

2009-12-21T06:21:00.000-08:00

These are some examples of Korean pop music, or "K-Pop." These songs have been stuck in my head at various points in the past couple weeks, so I think it's only fair that I try to get these songs stuck in your heads as well. And trust me, the attractiveness of the girls in the videos does nothing to decrease just how annoying most of these songs are.

Ok, I lied. I actually like this next song a lot, but only because the English translation of the lyrics is absolutely ridiculously hilarious. I've included the link for the lyrics in English after the video.

http://www.jpopasia.com/lyrics/14764/norazo/superman.html

I'm Famous

2009-12-21T05:52:00.000-08:00

So our little dance got some attention and now we are in a newspaper here in Korea. Here is the article (the picture at the top of the post is the picture that went along with the article):

http://www.tjinews.co.kr/ArticleView.asp?intNum=4222&ASection=001001

I'm assuming most of you won't be able to read that, but I assure you that it says nothing bad about any of us. The article doesn't even mention the dance, just the Korean contest. The paper just chose the most entertaining picture it had from the festivities to put with the article.

The point of all of this is I made it into a Korean newspaper, and not for any of the reasons most of you assumed I would make it into the newspaper for. Ha!

Enjoy

2009-12-17T18:55:00.000-08:00

That's me and some other teachers singing the chorus of "Sorry Sorry" by Super Junior as part of my speech at the Korean contest we were lucky enough to attend this week. We are also attempting the dance that goes along with the song. I think we look "great."

Now here's the actual song and dance. I can't really tell much of a difference between the two videos. Except for the fact that I'm better looking than anyone in the 2nd video. The part we tried to replicate starts at 59 seconds and runs to 1:29.

Showing You How Big of a Dork I Am

2009-12-03T01:31:00.000-08:00

I found all these videos tonight, and I think they are hilarious. They are posted funny to funniest, and that's not up for debate.

Some people have too much time on their hands.

I hate Scarface, but I love Star Wars. Shocking.

If you didn't laugh at least a little bit at that, we can't be friends anymore.

Funniest because of how ridiculous it is.

A Little Something For The Ladies

2009-12-02T06:08:00.001-08:00

There I am, with my sad Christmas tree, in all my bearded glory. Oh, what's that, you want another picture?

Merry Christmas! There's another one for you. Why am I standing so awkwardly next to the tree? Is it because I was worried my head would be cut off on the top of the frame so I crouched down to make sure I'd fit? Maybe. Or is it because I tripped trying to get next to the tree before the timer ran out on my camera, and then I stumbled into the tree right after that picture was taken? If that's what you were thinking, then you are a genius.

Now stop laughing at me, and go away.

Kitten Mittens!

2009-12-02T05:19:00.000-08:00

Liar!

2009-12-02T03:06:00.000-08:00

I did it again. It took me almost two weeks to write another blog post. Here's a conversation I had with a friend recently that probably sums up exactly what everyone is thinking:

"Brian, didn't you write on your last post that it wouldn't take you so long to write a new post?"

"Yes, (friend), I did write that."

"Then why is it taking so long for you to write something new?"

"I wrote something about that Korean newspaper I bought in Seoul!"

"You copied an excerpt from it. That doesn't count. You are just lazy."

"Hey, I've been pretty busy."

"With what?"

"Stuff."

"What stuff?"

"Important stuff."

"Give me an example."

"I've been growing a beard."

"........"

"Hello?"

"Shave."

I think that just about sums up how everyone is feeling. And no, I won't be shaving anytime soon. Moving on, it's time to catch everyone up on just how exciting Brian's life in Korea has been these past 2 weeks.

- I went to Seoul the weekend before Thanksgiving. Within an hour of being there, I wanted to go back to Taebaek. That city is too big for me, and there are too many Westerners there. The first place we visited was a bar, some "Irish Pub," the name of which isn't that important. I think I suffered some kind of culture shock in that place, because the fact that it was full of people who were not Korean, and there was English everywhere (wall signs, menus, being spoken) really bothered me. I did manage to buy a few books though, which was nice. And Friday night my arm was grabbed by a prostitute, which was and still is the most attention I've gotten from a girl in months (Awwwwwwwww).

- My Thanksgiving dinner was fantastic. Nothing says Thanksgiving quite like baked fish, raw beef, and rice. There were mashed potatoes, wrapped in something that I can't remember the name of, and they were delicious.

- Last Tuesday was my school's birthday. Which meant no school for the students. Did I get the day off too? Of course not. I was lucky enough to go on a field trip with the rest of the Hamtae teachers. I was the entertainment on this trip, given that I could not sit facing forward on any of the seats on the school bus we rode. The other teachers all had a good laugh at that. Good for them. Jerks (wipes tears away from eyes).

We went to the Gangwon International Language Institute (GILI) and Sin Young Elementary School, all located near Gangneung. GILI was actually a pretty interesting place, a big building on the beach used to house and teach English to Koreans. Sin Young Elementary School was nice, but I still have no idea why we went there. Yes, I asked, multiple times.

The highlight of the trip had to be stopping at a big outdoor fish market on our way back to Taebaek. I saw an old woman with an eye patch shoving crab in her mouth. Normally I wouldn't feel the need to mention that, but the old lady was so fascinating that she distracted me from noticing the octopus that had crawled/swam/slithered out of its bucket and onto my foot. I managed to hold in the very girly scream that was dying to escape my lips, and just kicked the lovely octopus off. Later I was looking at more octopus (octopuses? octopi? I don't care enough to look it up), when one of them squirted me with water. At least I think it was water. I hope it was water. Korean octopus don't like me.

- Christmas will be here soon. You should all send me something. I'm not sending any gifts home if I don't get something from you first. So there.

I bought far too many Christmas lights the other day. I have more than I know what to do with. I think I will hang some in my classroom. The first graders went nuts over the small "Merry Christmas" sign I hung over the white board today. I can't imagine what they'll do when they see Christmas lights. Hopefully not pee their pants. I don't want to clean that up.

- No, I haven't joined one of those photo websites to put my pictures up. I already told you, I've been busy. With stuff. Super important stuff......

Korean Newspaper Editorial

2009-11-22T05:25:00.000-08:00

"U.S. President Barack Obama's two-day stay in Korea should be the most stress-free leg of his four-nation East Asian swing - after dealing with unyielding Japan and almost arrogant China."

I think Korea thinks a little too highly of themselves.

I'm Tall

2009-11-19T06:23:00.000-08:00

Yes, believe it or not, I know that I'm tall. I've been tall most of my life. That's actually my favorite thing that I love to hear from people: "Wow, you sure are tall!" or "Did you know you're really tall?" or "Haha, you're taller than the van!" I can't get enough of it, seriously. I love people pointing out my physical attributes. In fact, I love it so much, that the next time someone points out to me that I'm tall, I'm going to point out something about their appearance to them. "Wow, you sure are ugly!" or "Did you know you are kind of overweight?" or "Haha, need help reaching that top shelf there?" This is how I was starting to feel living in the United States.

Now that I'm in Korea, I have to get used to it. Koreans are not an especially tall race. And as soon as I arrived in Taebaek, I knew I was going to get those height questions all the time. What I wasn't ready for was the staring. Everywhere I go, people stare at me. They are very obvious about it too. I've lost track of the number of times I have been standing at the bus stop down town, and a car slows down, almost stopping in front of me, with the driver staring wide eyed at me, the giant American, taking up space at the bus stop. Now this is probably a mix of the height and not being Korean, but still, they stare. A lot. It's kind of like I'm a celebrity. A very tall, akward looking celebrity.

Now I know that sounds awesome, but there are some drawbacks to being so tall in Korea, especially in a small-ish town like Taebaek. I had to go to 8 different stores before I found a coat that kinda sorta fit me. Beyond that, I can't find any clothes in town that fit me. I have to go to Seoul for that. Doorways? Most are low. I've encountered some that are really ridiculously low. Like bending over into a 90 degree angle to walk through low. I haven't hit my head that many times though, don't worry.

My height pays off sometimes though. My first and second grade classes love it when I jump and touch the ceiling. It's the best way to get them to shut up and listen to me. The teachers always make lots of room for me when we go out to dinner, so that I have room to spread my legs and stretch, which is nice. Aaaaaand that's about all I have right now. Those are two really lame perks of being tall. Damnit.

TV Shows You Should Watch

2009-11-19T05:33:00.000-08:00

Even in South Korea, I manage to watch too much tv. Most of it is quality stuff that no one should miss. But many of you are, because you are dumb, preoccupied with things like "responsibility" and "having a life." Losers.

This isn't currently on tv, due to the third season finale airing last weekend. But that shouldn't stop you from going out and buying/renting/downloading all three seasons and watching them as soon as possible. Mad Men is one of the best shows on tv right now. Well acted, good stories, funny, serious, Don Draper, and hot chicks, all in one fantastic show. And it makes me wish I had a job where I could drink all day. (Prays parents don't read this part of the blog)

Funniest show on tv right now. Dumb, stupid situations created by a bunch of idiots, and I laugh non stop at it all. Charlie is probably one of the funniest tv characters of all time. Everything that guy does makes me laugh. Danny DeVito is also hilarious as Frank. If you like a show like South Park, you'll love It's Always Sunny. Watch this clip below, and I dare you not to laugh:

Another one of my favorites. It fills my desire for a sports show, and for a cheesy teen drama, only it's a well done cheesy teen drama! It's a show based on a movie that was based on a book, about high school football in the small Texas town of Dillon. The show is entertaining as hell, and somehow it makes you really care about what happens to the characters. It gets a little dusty in the room whenever I watch. The football scenes are well done, and the show handles the typical high school/sports cliches surprisingly well. Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose.

Desperate Housewives

Haaaaaaaa just kidding! Seriously, I don't watch that crap. I don't even know who is in it. Doesn't Tony Parker play someone important? Yes? No? Maybe?

My favorite new show this season. Typical family comedy, only funnier. Three different types of families, all related, all interacting on a daily basis. The one dad acts a little too much like Michael from The Office, but it's more than made up for by the hilariousness of Mitchell and Cameron's relationship. (Yes, those are both male names. Sorry if that offends you. (I'm not really sorry, I just felt like that was a nice thing to say. Did I just do parenthesis inside parenthesis? Yup.)) It's also nice to see Al Bundy back in the picture.

There are more shows I'd like to talk about, but at this point you probably don't care anymore. So I'll shut up. Wait, no. WATCH THE WIRE!!!

Ok, now I'm done.

Catching Up

2009-11-19T04:55:00.000-08:00

Since I haven't posted in a while, and nothing that exciting has really happened to me recently, it's time for a quick round up of my life for the last two weeks. Because I know at least one person out there cares. Hi grandma! (Waves at computer screen)

1. I've been teaching 22 classes a week. I have no idea what I'm doing half the time. I think/kinda hope these kids are learning something. No one has told me to do anything different yet, so I guess we'll see how this goes.

2. I made a 5th grade girl cry last week. I was teaching the class some simple past tense verbs. I told the students to write their own past tense sentences. One girl came up to me with her sentence, looking very confident. She had written down "Im cute." Now, that's obviously wrong, but for some reason I had the worse possible reaction to reading that sentence: I started to laugh. She saw me laughing, ran back to her desk, put her head down, and started to cry. Whoops.

3. I hiked up Taebaeksan last weekend. It's a very tall mountain, and I'm pretty sure I wrote something about hiking up there last month. The hike isn't so bad, it's actually quite nice. However, there are a couple things to remember before you hike up a mountain: a. If it's pretty cold at the bottom before you start going up, you can be pretty sure it's going to be FREEZING at the top. And really ridiculously windy. b. Hiking down a mountain in the dark is a lot more fun than hiking up a mountain in daylight.

4. No Shave November! I'm starting to look like a sober-ish Kyle Orton.

5. I know I promised more pictures, but like I've said numerous times already, I'm lazy. So I'm just going to sign up for one of those picture websites, and I'll post the link here whenever I put new pictures up. This would be a great time to give you the link for that website wouldn't it? Too bad I haven't set that up yet. Whoops.

6. Notre Dame sucks again. Weis needs to go. He should be replaced by one of the following coaches: 1. Urban Meyer 2. Bob Stoops 3. John Gruden 4. Eric Taylor 99. Brian Newsom.

7. I'm going to Seoul this weekend. Believe it or not, I can't find pants that fit me in town. (That's a tall joke, not a fat joke you jerks.) I'm sure I'll have a funny story or two to share with you all after the weekend. Because that's what I'm here for, your entertainment. Dance, monkey, dance!

Lazy Lazy Lazy

2009-11-19T04:46:00.000-08:00

Yeah Yeah I know. I haven't posted in a few days. How lazy are you Brian, that you can't even write a post or two in 2 weeks. Wasn't the whole point of your blog to write short posts so that you could write frequently? Yes, it was. And obviously I'm super lazy. I'm going to change that from here on out, because I know you all can't live not knowing exactly what is going on with my life here. And I know you've all been going crazy with no new posts to read. So put down your pitchforks and torches, I'm gonna blog all over the place today. (Ew?)

Making Up For Slacking Off

2009-11-09T05:21:00.000-08:00

Are you ready for one of those slightly longer than 7 minutes posts? Good, because I've been slacking off recently (a movie post, really?) and I'm about to make it all up to you. You're going to get a longer post than usual, with pictures for those of you that can't read so well. Don't say I've never done anything nice for you.

For family and friends I don't talk to that often:

1. I'm teaching at Hamtae Elementary School, grades 1-6. There are only 90 students in the school, so I have small class, the biggest being 17 kids. Depending on the week I teach 20-22 classes. Thats 22 hours actually teaching. I "work" 40 hours a week. Yes, I spend way too much time online. At least I can stay current on all my television shows.
The teaching I do is pretty simple. 3-6 grades have a book to work with. So far, with those classes, the Korean teacher runs the show, with me standing there and repeating lines from the book when he/she wants me to. The 6th grade teacher is the worst at that. Today I stood in front of the 6th graders for 40 minutes, and repeated one line. Because of that, here is a picture of the 6th grade teacher from last Thursday night. He was not happy I took this picture.

I do have after school classes that I have complete control of, and those have been pretty fun so far. Most of the time they just turn into playing some type of game with the classes though. As long as they are speaking English I think everyone is ok with that.

That's my 1st grade after school class. See that kid's hat in the back left? I want that hat. I asked him for it. He said no. Little punk.

2. I've enjoyed most of the food I've eaten here. Just this past weekend I enjoyed a lot of raw fish and squid. Raw squid is fun because the suction cups on the tentacles will grab at your tounge if you keep it in your mouth without chewing long enough. If you eat a large enough tentacle, I've been told it fights back against going down your throat. Fun times.

3. I live on the 2nd floor of an ex-congressman house. It's a nice place. Lots of space. I can see my school from my front door, so my morning commute is short. I do live pretty far from downtown, which is inconvenient at times, but not having to travel 30+ minutes to school in the morning is a pretty good trade off.

For everyone else:

1. The basketball coaching thing hasn't gone anywhere yet. I think the swine flu might have something to do with that. I keep hearing about all the other schools in Taebaek getting shut down for a week because of the swine flu, but nothing cool like that has happened at Hamtae. Stupid Hamtae kids able to stay healthy. What's wrong with them!?

2. This past weekend I went with some friends up to Gangneung, which is on the east coast. Lots of fireworks were set off and even more fresh shellfish were enjoyed at 4am. You enjoy your late night Taco Bell. I'll take fresh shellfish.

3. The other part of the trip was to a Unification Museum on the DMZ. That's right, I saw North Korea. My mom already freaked out a little bit about that, but it really wasn't that big of a deal. It felt more surreal than unsafe. All the military present might have had something to do with that. It was kind of cool realizing that lots of barbed wire and fences along the beach and a long empty road was all that was seperating me and this guy:

Again, scary huh?

Look at this picture!

See that? Theres's North Korea. Exciting, right? Looks pretty communist-y doesn't it?

Obvious Question: Hey Brian, wouldn't it have been a good idea to take a picture of yourself with that behind you?
Obvious Answer: Hey, we can't all be as smart as you, jackass.

4. Some of the students in my 5th and 6th grade after school class used some of the words I taught them last week in the game we were playing in class today. Am I actually teaching these kids something, or were they looking at the vocab sheet I gave them earlier? Don't answer that.

5. If you are reading this, and I hope that you are, I'm sorry I was a jackass this weekend.

Alright, that's all I have. I'll have more on the DMZ trip later. Until then, enjoy.

Fin.

Movies You Should Watch

2009-11-02T17:14:00.000-08:00

I have too much free time when I'm not teaching, so I download (it's legal in Korea...I think) and watch too many movies. I'm going to tell you about a few of them now, and I hope that you will watch them. Then you will be as cool as me. Well, almost.

Anvil: The Story of Anvil

This is a documentary about a heavy metal band from the 80's named Anvil, obviously. They were pretty big for a year or two, then kind of died out. The band members still think they have another big breakthrough coming though, and it's kind of funny/sad. The movie follows a failed tour through Europe and the recording of their 13th album. White trash fans, crazy rationals for why they never made it big, a sister named Droid, and paintings of poop are just some of the high points of this movie.

(500) Days of Summer

Yes, I know it's kind of a chick flick. So what, quit judging me! I enjoyed it. It managed to take an over-used story from all kinds of other movies, and told it in an original way. It was funny and entertaining and Zooey Deschanel is cute as hell. And there's even a cameo from my favorite "Friday Night Lights" actress. The soundtrack is also really good. So there you go.

Paranormal Activity

This movie scared the crap out of me. Literally. I may or may not have had to change my underwear after watching it. Too much? Probably. Anyways, it really is the scariest movie I have seen in a long time. The shaky camera thing isn't that big of a deal, and it was a pretty good story as well as being scary. And don't watch it alone in your apartment at night. Or you might not be able to sleep that well after watching it. Just trust me on that. Am I a wimp? You bet.

The Hurt Locker

Best movie I have seen this year. It's the story of a bomb squad unit in Iraq. Great story, great acting, intense as hell. And no political undertones at all, like most of the other Iraq War movies that have been made. There were no "we shouldn't be here" talks or anything like that. Just a story about soldiers trying to survive. And it was a damn good story. Sgt. William James is my new favorite movie character, and makes me feel like and even bigger wimp than "Paranormal Activity" did.

Lesson Learned

2009-11-02T04:16:00.000-08:00

And that lesson is: make sure you get enough sleep/pay attention to what you are doing. Otherwise, when you go to cut your hair with your clippers, you'll forget to put the size guard thing on, and just go right down the middle of your head with the clippers on the lowest setting. You'll try to fix your mistake, try to even it out a little bit, but you aren't a professional hair stylist. You can barely give yourself a buzz cut without help. So you'll have to shave the hair on your head down to nothing.

And in case some of you are kind of slow (hi Glen), that just happened to me. It's ok, now I can be REALLY lazy and not have to worry about my hair for a couple of weeks. Good, great, grand, WONDERFUL.

Halloween!

2009-11-01T04:00:00.000-08:00

In case you didn't know, this past weekend was Halloween. Koreans don't celebrate Halloween like Americans do, but luckily the Americans in Korea do. Some highlights from the weekend:

1. Carving pumpkins on Friday night. Here's a picture of all the pumpkins carved and lit up. I bet you can figure out which one is mine.

B. 4 of us taking our carved pumpkins and throwing them off a bridge, smashing them, at 3 am. So mature.

C. An actual Halloween party Saturday night, with all the Westerners in Taebaek as well as a bunch of teachers from outside of Taebaek. I don't have a picture of me in my costume yet. Some people are slow are sending me the pictures they said they were going to send.....Don't worry though, I looked ridiculous.

4. My friend Miranda came to visit Saturday. She promised Halloween cookies and a home cooked meal. Still waiting for those....

5. Same friend almost beat me up Saturday night. Don't ask.

6. ND won, hooray.

7. Slept around 8 hours from Friday to Sunday. Good times.

Overall, a pretty good Halloween weekend.

Being Brian Newsom

2009-10-29T06:11:00.000-07:00

5 pm, Thursday October 29th, after school.

Boy, I sure am glad to be done with school today. I don't know how I made it through that last hour, sitting there watching tv shows on my computer. Oh well, now I finally get to go downtown and get my new coat. I can't believe I actually found one that fit me.

Oh, here comes my co-teacher. She's probably going to ask me for the lesson plan I still haven't done. Do I really need to type up a lesson plan that basically says "playing a game?" Damnit.

I'm going to dinner with all the other teachers? What? Cool, I guess. Free dinner. Although I'm not really looking forward to all the soju shots there are going to make me do. Looks like I'm not getting my coat till tomorrow.

I love sitting in the car with a bunch of Korean people that don't really speak English. Especially when I know they are talking about me. There! They said my name again! Do they think I'm stupid and won't hear them say "Brian?" I just looked over smiling at the 3rd grade teacher when I heard him say my name. Everyone laughed at him. I hope that's a good thing.

There are a lot of women sitting at the table with my principal that I don't recognize. This is kind of weird. Oh boy, the principal wants me to sit next to him at the table with all the women I don't know.

Huh, I didn't know Hamtae had a mom's volleyball team. That seems to be who all these women are. And they are passing around a trophy with a big "3" at the bottom of it. Third place? Must be celebrating winning 3rd place. I hope there were more than 4 teams.

What the....They are drinking soju out of that trophy. They also seem to be passing that around the table. Please don't come to me, please don't come to me. Crap, my principal just handed me the trophy and poured a bunch of soju in it. Here we go, bottoms up....

I hate the taste of straight soju, why do I keep drinking it? And did all the moms really have to yell "Welcome Brian" at the top of their lungs right before I drank. My face feels red, I think I'm blushing. That or I've had too much soju already....

I have to pee.

This bathroom smells....good?

The mom volleyball player sitting across from me is crying for some reason. The 6th grade teacher, a man, sits down next to her, putting his arm around her to console her. Wait, he also just handed her another shot of soju. Either I don't know how to console a crying Korean woman, or the 6th grade teacher is a creep.

The mom volleyball player next to me just asked if I've ever played volleyball. I answer "yes."
And now she's yelling "new coach, new coach!" Everyone turns to look at her as she's yelling that and pointing at me. Why did I come to this dinner?

Crying mom volleyball player and the 6th grade teacher are gone. Uh oh?

My co-teacher just told me it's time to go. All the moms look like they are just settling in for some more soju. I guess I don't get to stick around for that. Darn.

Hey, it's not too late! I can still get my coat! Success!

I Have a Camera

2009-10-25T07:31:00.000-07:00

After years of not owning a camera, I finally bought one this past Saturday. I'm not a big picture taker, I prefer to have people photograph whatever needs to be photographed for me. I've decided to become a little more independent though, so I'll be taking pictures of my adventures now. They will be the most beautiful photos you have ever seen. I guarantee it. I don't have time to load a lot of pictures right now, but I'll go ahead and give you a little preview of the quality you'll be seeing in my photographs.

Look at that. How are you not excited to see more of my pictures? I don't even need to say any more. That picture up there is worth 2,000 words.

Our Bus Driver Was A Little Angry

2009-10-22T05:19:00.001-07:00

It's time for one of those longer than 7 minute posts I mentioned when I started this little blog. I went on a field trip with the students and teachers of Hamtae Elementary to the towns of Donghae and Yangyang-Gun today.

The trip was fantastic, and a ton of great things happened. Instead of writing about a couple highlights of the trip, I decided to keep a running diary of sorts during the day, which I have posted here for you all to see. If this turned out ok, let me know, and I'll try something like this again. If not, I'm sorry I wasted your time, but it's my blog and I can do what I want with it. So there. Wow that sounds a little immature. Eh.

Alright, now that we have that out of the way, let's begin!

8:45am: I came to school at 8:15 because I was told we were leaving at 8:30. However, the students have all been sitting in the auditorium since 8:25, getting a "have a good trip" speech from the principal. Most of the kids already look like they want to go home. Good start to the day.

8:50: As the students are filing out of the auditorium, they have their temperature taken with one of those in the ear thermometers. The teachers taking the temps are wearing masks and gloves. The thermometer, however, is not wiped off between students, and those little plastic cover pieces are not used. The school is now infested with Swine Fl...I mean H1N1. Even better start to the day.

9:30: We have been on the bus for 30 minutes now. I'm riding with the 4th, 5th, and part of the 6th grade classes. I'm sitting in the front of the bus with 2 other students, who I have assumed are sitting there because they get car sick. They are both holding bags in their laps, I'm pretty sure it's a safe assumption. They gave the students ice cream bars, even the students sitting in the front that get car sick. Seems like a bad idea, but I've been wrong before. I guess we'll see how this turns out.

9:40-ish: Student sitting across the aisle from me just threw up. There is puke/ice cream all over the front of his shirt. Way to use the bag you asked for buddy. Seems like the ice cream wasn't such a good idea.

9:45: The driver has put on a movie for us to enjoy. Well, everyone but me. The movie is in Korean, and no subtitles. I'm tired anyway, so I'm going to sleep.

10:30: We have made it to our destination in Donghae. I wake up, and some of the students are staring at me. I check my shirt for drool and I'm clean. I ask the teacher behind me why they are staring. Apparently I burped loudly while sleeping. Fantastic.

10:45: We are taking a boat ride around the coast of Donghae. I've been told it will take 30 minutes. Seems like it will be fun. It's kind of windy and the students are going nuts at how much the boat is rocking.

10:55: We're back at the dock. The 30 minute boat ride was less than 10 minutes. We're going back to the bus now to leave. I'm a little confused by this, but the kids seem happy and I guess that's all that matters.

11:10: We're back on the bus and on our way to lunch. For our enjoyment the bus driver has now out on a cd of Korean pop music (K-Pop). All the students are singing along. Is it ok for me to wear my headphones while on a field trip with kids?

11:55: I'm ready to stab the pen in my pocket into my ears. Luckily it's lunch time!

12:05: Damnit! We walked to look at some lighthouse. I am starving, and there is a tour guide telling the kids all about the light house. I have no clue what he is saying.

12:15: The tour guide is done talking. The 4th grade teacher can tell I look confused, so she comes over to talk to me, hopefully to tell me what the guide was just saying. "He said, 'this is the oldest light house in Gangwon.'" It took him 10 minutes to say that? I'm never going to learn Korean.

12:30: We're heading to lunch now. I'm almost sure of it. And in case you have been keeping track, yes, we have spent more time on the bus than at our stops.

12:45: The bus has been passing tons of restaurants offering fresh fish to eat. I'm a little bit excited about eating fish.

12:55: We are eating at the cafeteria of some "Sea Training" school. Chicken, rice, tofu soup, and kimchi. The same thing I get for lunch once or twice a week. Son of a....

1:20: The light house guide is still here, talking to the students about who knows what. Some of the 6th graders are mesmerized by my arm hair. I was told this was going to happen, but it still creeps me out a little. They keep trying to rub my arm hair. I need to go back to the bus.

1:35: We're on our way to our last stop of the day, an "experimental fish research building" in Yangyang-Gun. Sounds like fun. The bus driver is playing the same K-Pop cd over again. Instead of reaching for my pen to stab into my ears, I just pull out my headphones. My co-teacher is asleep behind me, so I can't get yelled at if I'm doing something wrong.

2:30: We have finally arrived to the "experimental fish research building." My mp3 player died 5 minutes after turning it on. So I got to enjoy the music on the bus. If I have to listen to that f'n K-Pop cd one more time, I'm going to punch a student.

2:35: More students rubbing my arm hair.

2:45: Just realized we are at a fish nursery. The "experimental fish building" is a fish nursery. Lame.

3:15: Finished a tour of the nursery. The tour was in Korean, of course, but the tour guide used a lot of pictures to explain what goes on there, so I figured it out for the most part. They harvest fish for their eggs, then use those eggs to make even bigger fish for all kinds of fish related purposes. The students looked thrilled by all of this.

3:30: Number of students that have touched my arm hair in the last 15 minutes: 5. Number of students punched: 3. Kidding!! Just kidding!! I swear.....

3:35: I was just sort of yelled at by the 2nd grade teacher for "playing around" with the students too much. I was playing rock paper scissors with them. I don't like the 2nd grade teacher.

3:40: Back on the bus! We're heading back to Hamtae! It's going to take 2 and a half hours! Sh@#!

3:50: No more K-Pop cd! The bus driver has put on a movie, and it has English subtitles. The name of the movie is "200 Pound Beauty." This trip might just have a good ending.

4:00: "200 Pound Beauty" is actually a funny movie. But the students complained that they didn't like it, so it was taken off. Replaced by the K-Pop cd. For the third time. What is wrong with these kids?? I'm going back to sleep.

5:45: I'm awake, drool and burp free this time, and we're back at Hamtae. We spent 75% of the day on the bus, but it was still a fun trip. And the students all seemed to enjoy it, and like I said before, that's all that matters.

Alright, there you go. My field trip in all its glory. hope you enjoyed it as much as I did. This took longer to write than I thought, so you won't be getting one of these for a little while. I'm lazy, remember? It's why this blog is called 7 Minutes Or Less.

Random Thoughts/Happenings

2009-10-19T07:14:00.000-07:00

I have a lot to write about, and since I don't want/am too lazy to write a bunch of short posts, you are getting one short post summarizing everything I wanted to write about. Makes sense right? No? Oh well.

1. Went on a cultural trip with most of the other EPIK teachers from Taebaek. We went to the Andong area, which is in Gyeongsangbuk-do. Saw a lot of cool stuff, like the Soju Museum. Still don't have a camera though. That trip deserves a post of its own, and it will get one soon, but like I said I'm lazy right now so this will have to do

2. Found a huge Lord of the Rings puzzle put together and framed behind a book shelf in my classroom. First question that popped in my head wasn't "Where did this come from?" It was "Which would make me less of a dork: hanging this in my classroom or apartment?"

3. It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia is the funniest show on television. You can't argue that. The picture at the top of this post proves my point.

4. The only reason Jimmy Clausen won't win the Heisman Trophy is ESPN doesn't love him like they love Tim Tebow. Well, that and Florida actually has a defense that stops other teams from scoring.

5. I enjoy the food here. This also deserves a post of its own, and that's coming soon along with the cultural trip post, but someone asked me to talk about the food. Here you go.

6. I had a break through at the Korean language class last week. I can now count to ten in Korean. Hold your applause, please. You're embarrassing me.

7. I'm teaching 6 classes and going on a field trip this week. It sounds rough, but someone has to do it.

Go Irish Beat Trojans

2009-10-15T05:15:00.000-07:00

This Saturday Notre Dame plays Southern Cal in South Bend. This is the biggest game of the season for the Irish, and probably the biggest game since they played USC in 2005.

ND needs to win this game. Charlie Weis needs ND to win this game. ND fans need ND to win this game. Win, and that shuts everyone up about ND not beating anyone good recently. Win, and maybe Weis just might make it in South Bend after all. Win, and the locals of Taebaek might see a really tall American running around their streets screaming early Sunday morning. I'm not saying it's going to happen, I really have no idea how the game will play out. All I do know is I'll be waking up at 4:00 am Sunday here in South Korea to watch the game on a crappy live stream on my laptop. And I can't wait.

Oh, and if ND does win, I'm pretty sure that means I can't go back to the US. Ever.

A Humble Request

2009-10-11T07:51:00.000-07:00

3 posts in less than 2 hours?? How bored is Brian?? I'm not that bored, just motivated. Alright, maybe a little bored too.

Comment people! Tell me what you like, what you don't like. If you want more information, tell me! If you want me to stop writing and shut up, tell me! I won't listen, but at least I'll have one less person to think about at Christmas this year.

I know there are a few family members reading this, and I apologize if some of the off color humor is offending you. I'd tell you that I'm trying to knock it off, trying to be more mature, but that would be a lie. Honestly, it's probably going to get worse over the next year.

Alright, that's all I have. Just give me your feedback, and I won't bother you again.

Also, if you want to send me anything, I'll be more than happy to give you my address. Hint, hint...

Heartbreaker

2009-10-11T07:23:00.000-07:00

Watch that video above. It's from the movie "Lost in Translation." I know it took place in Japan and not Korea. Get over it.

Something similar happened to me when I was waiting for the bus tonight. Only it was a lot funnier/creepier.

I was sitting there waiting for my bus, minding my own business, when a group of elderly Korean folk walked up to the bus stop and sat next to me. I should say staggered up to the bus stop, because they were all drunk. A couple of them had soju bottles hanging out of their coat pockets. (I'll tackle soju in another post. For right now though, it's alcohol.) One especially drunk fellow sat next to me and attempted to strike up a conversation. I tried to tell him I didn't understand, but he just kept on going. I just kept smiling politely and nodding a lot. At one point I swear I heard the word "name" so I tried to tell him my name was Brian. He laughed a lot at that.

And then he grabbed my knee.

This wasn't a little pat. This was grab and hold on for too long action. I instantly regretted nodding my head and saying yes to everything he had been saying to me in Korean for the past few minutes.

Now, this might be something that is ok around Korea. One man grabbing another man's knee might be practiced daily around here for all I know, and it might be something I'm just going to have to get used to. But I grew up believing that if another person, especially a drunk one, grabbed your knee, it meant bad (or good depending on who was grabbing your knee) things were coming. So it threw me off a little bit. Luckily my bus arrived shortly after I found his hand resting on my knee, so I said goodbye and left. It was a very interesting/scary/awkward/(word removed because people can't pick up on sarcasm at all. idiots) end to my day. Wait, one of those adjectives shouldn't have been included in that last sentence. It's ok, it's not like my family reads this blog....

I hope I didn't break that drunk old man's heart.

Go Irish

2009-10-11T06:36:00.000-07:00

I like looking for Koreans wearing clothes featuring American sports teams. Baseball hats with Major League Baseball teams on them are everywhere. Today alone I saw two White Sox hats, two San Francisco Giants Hats, an Atlanta Braves hat, and of course a Yankees hat. I saw a New York Giants shirt my second day here, and I saw a Boston Celtics shirt a few days ago.

I had never seen an American college or university represented on any type of clothing though. Until today. I was wandering through a store in downtown Taebaek, and I almost ran into a Korean kid wearing a White Sox hat. I apologized, stepped aside, and that was when I noticed what the girl behind him was wearing. She had on the most beautiful sweatshirt I have seen since I arrived in Korea. Can you guess what her sweatshirt said? Cooooome on, I know you can guess. Just look at the picture at the top of this post.....

That's right, she was wearing a University of Notre Dame sweatshirt. I wanted to say something to her, give her a high five or a hug maybe. But I thought that might be a little awkward, so I just stared for a minute too long, then left. THEN, a mere 10 minutes later, I walked by a random clothing store, and hanging there on a rack right by the door were two more Notre Dame sweatshirts. There were no other clothes with sports teams logos on them in the store, believe me, I checked. Just the two ND sweatshirts hanging there. I would have bought one, but they don't make clothes in giant size here.

Seeing those sweatshirts today was some kind of sign, I'm just not sure what. Does this mean I was meant to come here? Possibly. Does it mean ND is going to beat USC next weekend? I freaking hope so. Or is it all just a big coincidence? Most likely. Either way, it was pretty cool to see.

I'm Living Alone?!

2009-10-08T07:07:00.000-07:00

FAMILY DISCLAIMER: THERE IS MATERIAL IN THIS POST YOU MIGHT NOT WANT TO READ IF YOU ARE A FAMILY MEMBER. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

I realized a few days ago that this is the first time I have lived by myself. All my life I've lived either at home or with roommates. I have had no problems with either situation. Well, living at home when you are 25 isn't exactly the greatest situation, but it's better than living on the street.

Living alone has been awesome so far. I'll go ahead and give you a quick run down of just how great it has been:

1. I can rock out to any music I want. If I want to listen to a podcast from ESPN while I'm getting ready for work, I don't have to worry about someone telling me to turn it down. If I want to rock out to Beyonce or Taylor Swift before I go running, I don't have to worry about my brother Eric watching me, judging me. That was an IF at the start of that sentence too. I'm not admitting to anything.

2. Hey, Brian, there are dirty dishes in the sink. Oh, what's that? You're the only person using those dishes so you know they'll get cleaned eventually? Ok, that's cool. Forget I said anything.

3. If I forget to hang my towel on the door before I shower, oh well. I can walk around my place butt ass naked and no one will ever know. Well, except for all the friends and family that read this blog. In that case, forget I said anything.

That's just a little sampling of just how sweet my life is living alone. I'm sure I'll have more to add to that list eventually. Probably not anything I want to make public knowledge, but you never know.

Goodbye forever.

Not really. That just sounded good.

Pointless Baseball Predictions

2009-10-08T00:43:00.001-07:00

I made these before the games today, I just didn't post them. Most of you probably don't care. Too bad.

Red Sox over Angels
Yankees over Twins

Dodgers over Cardinals
Phillies over Rockies

Red Sox over Yankees
Dodgers over Phillies

Dodgers over Red Sox.

I'm probably an idiot.

Coach Newsom Sounds Better Than Coach Bombay

2009-10-07T22:04:00.000-07:00

Fair warning at the start: There are movie references here that some people might not get. If you do get them and still don't think it's funny, well then you obviously have no heart.

After lunch every day this week I've been playing basketball with the students here at Hamtae. It went from them just shooting around the first day to me attempting to get them to form lay up lines today. After lunch this afternoon my vice principal came up to me with another teacher. I thought I was going to get yelled at for causing a commontion or something after lunch. Not true!

According to the vice principal, as told to me through the teacher with her, the students have been telling their teachers all week about how much they enjoy playing basketball with me after lunch(I know I know, I'm awesome). And apparently they used to have a girls basketball team here but it was stopped because no one wanted to coach it. I was informed today that the principal and vice principal wanted to start the basketball back up again, since they now have a coach: me. Fantastic.

This brings me to the picture above. My situation is setting up exactly like Gordon Bombay's in the Mighty Ducks. I'm going to take this group of rag tag ball players from here in the mountains of South Korea and take down the team of jerks from Seoul (or anyplace else that has a basketball team) that hasn't lost in forever. (I'm assuming there are other teams around here of course.) And then, after we win the championship, I'll be asked to coach the South Korean Junior Basketball team and I'll lead them to victory over what would have to be the team of over confident Americans. (I'm pretty sure Iceland doesn't have a junior basketball team.) And yes that's the same story as D2: The Mighty Ducks. It's going to be a hilarious, heart warming journey for all involved.

Or I'll just end up having kids shoot around and maybe run some drills after lunch every day.

No Hablo Korean

2009-10-05T04:38:00.000-07:00

You see that picture? That's what I feel like trying to learn even the simplest parts of the Korean language. I feel like laying on the ground and dying after spending just 30 minutes trying to figure out the alphabet. Over dramatic much? You bet. I consider myself a smart guy (stop laughing) but this Hangul (that's what the Korean language is called) thing is frustrating.

Living in such a small and rural area, it's almost a requirement to learn the language. I can't really ride the bus or buy a lot of the food in the stores here without having at least a basic understanding of the language. And I'd love to know what people are talking about around me. There has been too many times when I've seen people looking right at me, pointing and talking. I'd like to think they are asking each other where such a good looking American came from. But they are probably trying to figure out just how tall I am. Or talking about the building behind me. Sigh.

I'll pick it up eventually. I do have a year left here. Using gestures and Konglish will only get me so far.

Rant over.

Lost Already

2009-10-04T01:43:00.000-07:00

Well that didn't take very long. Believe it or not, when you can't read the signs on the buildings around you, and you space out while running for a while, you might get lost. Which is was happened to me today. No worries though! I assumed I would get lost at least once after I moved here, so I made the best of it and stopped where I was, curled up in a ball on the sidewalk, and started crying.

Oh come on does that sound like something I would do? Don't answer that. What really happened was I just wandered around, checking things out. It didn't take too long for me to figure out where I was, but I was definitely a long way from my apartment. I had spent the money in my pocket on a drink and snack, so I couldn't catch a cab home. It worked out though, since I found myself right in front of the tourist center, and I finally got a map of Taebaek. It's not very useful though, just a big picture of the city with landmarks on it.

Lesson learned today kids: if you get lost in a city where you don't speak the language, don't start crying in the middle of the sidewalk. People are going to make fun of you. Not that I did that. Seriously, I didn't.

Oh just go away.

The Mountains Here Are Very Tall

2009-10-03T00:51:00.000-07:00

I went hiking up Mt. Taebaek this morning with a couple other teachers from the area, Kat and Rob. It was a good time, topped off by a meal made entirely of Korean food that I actually enjoyed. Whether I actually enjoyed it or was just starving from hiking all morning has yet to be determined.

This would have been a good day to have a camera, since the view from the top of the mountain was amazing, and there was a ceremony happening at the top celebrating their "Founding Day." But I didn't think I would need a camera right away, so I don't have one. Genius. Also, the water streaming down from the mountain is drinkable (supposedly) and the cab driver who took us to the park told us it had healing powers. Yes, I drank the water. I'm now waiting for one of two things to happen sometime today: The little cold I have goes away or I spend the rest of the day on the toliet. I'll keep you all posted.

My apartment is finally cleaned and organized. It looks awesome. I think.

Bee Fight

2009-10-01T20:45:00.000-07:00

While cleaning my apartment, what appeared to be a giant South Korean bee attacked me. And by "attacked" I mean "flew around the room harmlessly, but it was huge and I had never seen one before so I freaked out." After a long battle that was nothing more than me running around the room waving my sandal in the air, the bee finally flew out the window I opened for it. The bee was gone, but I felt like I lost. It definitely got the better of me today. South Korean bee: 1 Brian: 0.

Some thoughts while cleaning:
1. Pretty sure I cleaned a lot of my apartment with Korean Febreeze, not Lysol.
2. I won't be opening my windows anymore until I get a screen on them. I'll sweat to death before I deal with a South Korean bee again.
3. I don't think the girl that was here before me liked it here very much. I found a calendar she left behind, and September 3, 2009 is marked as "LAST DAY IN KOREAN HELL." I was told she was weird though, so I'm not too worried.

Pictures!

2009-10-01T18:16:00.000-07:00

Just kidding. I didn't bring a camera with me to South Korea. Good call on that one Brian. I'll be buying a camera soon though, don't you worry.

Just kidding about the constant updates on my apartment cleaning too. I wrote that post, realized I was tired, and went to bed. I could say you should look forward to those updates today, but that probably won't happen either, so I won't get your hopes up. This is where you all say "thank you."

Distracted Already?

2009-10-01T05:23:00.000-07:00

I took a walk around Taebaek today. This place is fantastic, but I definitely need to learn more Korean than I already know (which doesn't go beyond "hello" and "thank you" and even "thank you" I struggle to remember sometimes). My shopping trip alone for the first time today is another good reason to learn Korean as soon as possible. I bought what looked like some normal ramen type noodle thing for a quick dinner. It turned out to be the spiciest ramen I've ever tried to eat. It's alright though, I really did just want to eat cookies for dinner.

People stare at me when I walk around downtown. It's because I'm so good looking....right?

I'm in the process of cleaning/organizing my apartment. I hate this stuff. Get ready for constant updates about the progress of my cleaning and organizing. Ohhhhhhh so exciting.

Hello There

2009-09-30T22:42:00.001-07:00

This is my first post, obviously, so I figured I'd explain the title. I borrowed it from a book I just read about the 2005-2006 Phoenix Suns. That team believed they performed their best in the first 7 seconds they had the ball on offense. I believe that I'll write my best posts in 7 minutes. And none of these posts should take longer than 7 minutes to read. Who really wants to read ridiculously long posts about how awesome my life is? No one, that's who. I'm also too lazy to keep a blog called "70 minutes or less" or even "17 minutes or less."

You'll be getting short, quick updates on my life here in South Korea. No, it won't be like Twitter. I won't be putting up posts that just say "gtg out tnght omg lol!@@!one" I'm not a 13 year old girl. I just want to tell the people who care what's going on with my life and hopefully answer the same questions I get from everyone everyday in one place. Again, that's the laziness kicking in.

Alright that's it. Did it take me longer than 7 minutes to write this post? You're damn right it did. And that's going to happen. Sometimes I'll spout off about something that made me really happy or more than likely really angry. Yes, I lied a little at the start of this post about the whole 7 minutes thing. Oh well. You'll all live.